is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
