So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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