id be glad to
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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