Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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