Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
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