Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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