Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
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He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
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I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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