She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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