I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
