i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
