from now on my penis is your penis
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
