umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
