He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Randomize
