Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
