I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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