Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Duck Duck Cougar?
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
