garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
