I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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