Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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