Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
