so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
