they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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