its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
