don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
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