he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Randomize
