it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
