Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
how does that bad decision feel?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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