I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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