Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
