At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
