I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Hippo gnu deer
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??