Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
