Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
