i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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