we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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