you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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