Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
