A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
