dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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