That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
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