This girl is more easily done than said...
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
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I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
he just fucked me for my cheese.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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