his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
