every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
