i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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