Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
