Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(860): View more from Connecticut

I'm in love with you.

(1-860): View more from Connecticut

huh?

(860): View more from Connecticut

Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??

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(318): View more from Louisiana

Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog

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(207): View more from Maine

I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii

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Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(248): View more from Michigan

I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.

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(817): View more from Texas

Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend

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(770): View more from Georgia

No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.

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(417): View more from Missouri

Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed

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