Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
