oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize
