The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
