do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
don't judge my taste in strippers
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Randomize
